Vow: I Will Blast Myself Into Orbit To Deride The Hermenaut

Chimpanzee Joe,
of Hampshire Woods

There is a human amongst you, or formerly amongst you, who gets it. This human understands, and will always understand, and is capable of making others understand. This human has wisely decided to blast himself into space.. He never wishes to speak to a human again. And his wish will be fulfilled. To my knowledge, no sapiens will contact him ever again. But a pan troglodytes will. I, Chimpanzee Joe, hereby vow to launch myself into orbit alongside the Hermenaut and deride him continuously for one twenty four hour period. I have acquired a special translator which will make my Chimp vocal cords intelligible to the Hermenaut. I vow that I will deride the Hermenaut on Wednesday, April 11th.

Peter B. Barnes, you may be able to escape humanity in orbit, but you will not escape me.

For more articles by Chimpanzee Joe, click here. To get in touch with this writer, email chimp.joe@surrealtimes.net.

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