The top psychologists in the country, after meeting at the bi-annual National Summit, have returned with a dire warning: rationality is under siege. Long considered a bastion of logic, the brain is increasingly found to be a collection of shortcuts. A recent experiment found that when an experimental group were exposed to small doses of surreality, given by pulling a lever, the group became resistant to reality, and near-immune to the call of rationality. The recently discovered New Mexico Surreal Engine, the psychologists fear, may be an enabler for such irresponsible behaviors. While I have a duty to remain objective, I must give my opinion: to dabble with surreality in such an unwholesome manner is to invite in destabilizing influences. We already have enough citizens obsessed with such delusions as the “Stairway To The Stars.”

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