Fountain Of Youth Located

Moe “Tiny” Schlemiel,
Surreal Times Reporter

In the last issue, The Times reported that Marcus van Door, 63, AKA The Baron Of Bullets, placed a ten million dollar bounty on the Fountain Of Youth. Today, the Baron announced that he has found the Fountain of Youth on a small island off the coast of Argentina. However, the bounty has not been paid out. The Baron claims he found the island through his own research. At a press conference today, the Baron showed off a vial of water purportedly from the Fountain. He has refrained from exposing himself to the water until its effects can be determined. “I do this for everyone. Soon we will spread the healing waves of the Fountain,” said the Baron. The Surreal Times will document this history as it unfolds.

For more articles by Moe “Tiny” Schlemiel, click here. To get in touch with this writer, email tiny.schlemiel@surrealtimes.net.

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