Government To Begin Investigation of The 'Shower Act'
The ‘Shower Act’ is when a human of any age, shape, size or scent strips to their bare skin and stands under the watery espousings of a chromed hemisphere- the water is produced by its holed base. The humans that partake in such an act find it to be relaxing. They enjoy not only the water, from the chromed hemisphere, but the mysterious fog generated within the “bathroom” or “shower cubicle” [1] during the 'Shower Act’.
This strange Act affects the individual on both a mental and physical level. In the realm of the psyche an individual may experience complete and utter mental drift from their everyday life- as if riding a boat upon the very water droplets that cover their bodies. On a physical level, the individual basks in the base pleasure of the warmth of the water and gazes into the mysterious fog that surrounds them. They may also enjoy the practice of lathering themselves in softly and sweetly scented soaps.
The individual finds this relaxing as it prepares them for the inevitable period of lighted or darkened time that will follow (dependent on the time of the 'Shower Act’). Humans find both the light and dark incredibly stressful.
One individual woke up one morning, removed their clothes, climbed into their shower and never left. Surviving solely only on dampened toast, [2] it’s estimated they lived this way for 1,327.0645 days before running out of bread. It’s then believed the individual attempted to escape the bathroom, only to become utterly lost in the mysterious fog that enveloped their home. This poor person--as a result of their quest for escape from both the light and dark-- perished alone. When found, their body was so shriveled and pink it was unidentifiable.
Another individual, Mrs Bertie Worcester Sheerston III, entered a stressful time in her life. Shortly after, she entered the shower. Were it not for her wife wondering why the water bill was so high and, coincidentally, investigating the source of the mysterious fog beginning to seep from the crack under the bathroom door, Mrs Sheerston III may well have ended up like the above victim of the 'Shower Act’. Whilst her body was saved she unfortunately remains-- at least for the foreseeable future--trapped in the ‘Shower Act’ state of mind. Riding a small boat down a never ending cascade of water.
Despite the common occurrence of the 'Shower Act’, little is understood about the state of mind an individual enters; nor is much known about the long term effects on the body that the 'Shower Act’ has. Because of this, the cases mentioned above--and many others like them-- the Great Government has begun a huge funding programme to research the 'Shower Act’.
What follows this research will undoubtedly be complex legislation and great upset for those that only recreationally engage in the 'Shower Act’.
[1] A glass box in which a nude individual stands to engage in the 'Shower Act’.
[2] The bread was stored in a freezer installed within arm's reach of the shower, it was toasted in a small 2 slice toaster kept atop the freezer. They were powered by a plug socket outside the bathroom- for safety reasons.
POST A COMMENT
See Also
Want to read more news? Click here for a random article.