Gravity Preppers Train For Gravitationally Unstable Future

A cul de sac in El Segundo California is notoriously home to a group of families who spend their days preparing for the times when the strength of gravity becomes unstable. In fear of spontaneous gravity shifts, these people wear bricks on their feet. They tether their houses to nearby trees. They put nets over their yards so their children won't float away.

Recently, they have become even more proactive about the strange gravity of the future.

"Yes, we have begun training." Mrs. Plumbnot said, "We've come to terms with the fact that, in the future unstable gravitational world, we can't hope to remain grounded at all times. And so, we ought to get used to floating in 0 or negative Gs."

What Mrs. Plumbnot is referring to, when she says, "training", is parabolic airplane flights. These flights simulate the feeling of zero gravity. Mrs. Plumbnot spends an enormous amount of money renting these airplanes so that her and her family can practice maneuvering and doing daily tasks without the help of gravity.

"We are improving quickly!" she was proud to say. "And we can only hope to inspire others to prepare as well."

The gravity prepper community appears to be growing in both size and diversity as the rumored "destabilization of 2022" approaches. One can only wonder what the futu re will bring.

For more articles by Dernberger Spengleton, click here. To get in touch with this writer, email spengleton@surrealtimes.net.


POST A COMMENT


See Also

Want to read more news? Click here for a random article.