Surreal Times Joins The New York Times

The Editors,
Times Staff

Upon further consideration, we have decided not to join The Argonaut. Instead, we have accepted an offer to be bought out by The New York Times for $10 million. We thank the New York Times for their belief in our journalistic inquiries, and we look forward to our future reporting the most important stories on such a prestigious platform. With all the money The New York Times has thrown at us, we will buy a squid farm so we are no longer reliant on Big Ink for our newspaper prints. The Times will allow us to continue working mainly in Los Angeles, California and Amherst, Massachusetts, but our top journalists will relocate to New York City effective immediately. We will also be laying off half of our staff to consolidate our best and brightest journalists.

We thank you all for the continued support and love. Find our stories in The New York Times starting in May.

For more articles by The Editors, click here. To get in touch with this writer, email management@surrealtimes.net.

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