FOR IMMEDIATE DISPATCH TO ALL READERS:
IT HAS COME TO OUR ATTENTION THAT THE THROES OF WINTER HAVE NEGATIVELY IMPACTED THE MORALE OF MANY OF YOU -STOP- AS SUCH WE HAVE DECIDED TO PRINT A SET OF TASKS FOR YOU TO COMPLETE BEFORE NEXT ISSUE (WHERE MORE TASKS WILL BE ISSUED) -STOP- THESE TEN TASKS WILL BE YOUR MARCHING ORDERS IN THE REBELLION AGAINST MUNDANITY -STOP- WE TRUST THAT THEY WILL BRING YOU LIGHT AND GLEE IN THE COLD AND DARK -STOP-
YOURS,
THE SURREAL TIMES
- 1: Leave a glass eye in a wishing fountain.
- 2: In the park in the depth of a February night, decorate a Christmas tree.
- 3: Treat everywhere you walk like a museum.
React as such.
- 4: Memorize three poems.
- 5: Remove all the dust jackets on your hardcover books and replace them upside down.
- 6: Wear hawaiian shirts in winter time.
- 7: Identify three simple lines on your commute and commemorate them somehow.
- 8: Make and maintain a shrine for the week and then burn everything that was involved.
- 9: Make a list of ten things you would do as an eccentric rich person, do as many as you can.
- 10: Give away a dozen white roses, one at a time. If questioned why, make up a new story for each one.
CUT THESE ORDERS OUT AND FULFILL THEM.
FIND FRIENDS IN SURREALITY.
LOVE VICIOUSLY AND WITHOUT FAIL.
For more articles by The Editors, click here.
To get in touch with this writer, email
management@surrealtimes.net.
POST A COMMENT
See Also
Want to read more news? Click here for a random article.
