The Spot Director Kerm Fergus Goes Missing
Kerm Fergus, writer/director/caterer/star of 2018 summer blockbuster The Spot was reported missing today by the Akron, OH police. He was last seen at his aunt’s house last Friday.
“Kerm looked white as a sheet and kept mumbling nonsense about a minotaur,” says Ellaine Fergus, the director’s 92-year-old aunt. “Right before he walked out the door, he said to me ‘they want my soul, Auntie.’” This was the last time Ellaine had seen him before he exited the house and disappeared.
Kerm Fergus, 48, is a high school janitor and part-time independent filmmaker, whose hundreds of directing credits span all the way back to 1996, and include titles like The Smurf Exterminator and I Cheese on Your Grave. He scored it big recently with the success of The Spot, a superhero film that grossed $400 million against a $50 budget. Fergus does every aspect of the filmmaking process himself, from directing, to camerawork, editing and lighting.
This creates an even bigger problem for Big Movie Studios, who just signed a 6 picture deal with Fergus. These include The Spot II, as well the screen adaptation of MrsWeasley188's award-winning fanfiction, Voldemort Goes to Hawaii. Fergus’s disappearance will no doubt set the studio behind schedule. “Fergus has of late become our company’s bread and butter,” says big movie president Lionel McHumble, “here’s to a safe return for Kerm.”
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