Whorf's Cactus Balm: A Cure For Degeneracy
Do you find yourself slipping into degeneracy? Has your hygiene lapsed? Thoughts unraveled? Speech disordered? Basic function impaired? Well look no further!
My name is Emmanuel E. Whorf, and I have the product for you: Whorf’s Cactus Balm, made only with the finest cactus and the most potent balm. This miraculous cure will fix your apathy and laziness, reversing your inevitable slide into degeneracy which all civilized people face. It is also guaranteed to protect from the insidious intrusion of dastardly, un-civic thoughts which seem to pervade our society more and more these days.
This has been Emmanuel E. Whorf, Cactus Balmer.
For more articles by Emmanuel E. Whorf, click here.
To get in touch with this writer, email
whorf.emmanuel@surrealtimes.net.
POST A COMMENT
See Also
Want to read more news? Click here for a random article.