Dear Jupiter: My Best Friend Froze Herself

Advice lady

Dear Jupiter,
I am so angry at my friend right now.

When the pandemic started back in March and the entire country was on lockdown, we both agreed that we would cryogenically freeze ourselves until the virus was over. We did some research, and it ended up costing over $1,000 per month to freeze yourself. Not knowing how long the pandemic would last, my friend suggested we should stay frozen for at least three months. There was no way I could afford $1,000 a month to freeze myself. I just had gotten laid off from my job and was constantly struggling to pay my rent, so naturally, I couldn’t afford to freeze myself.

We got into a huge fight, and she ultimately decided to go through with the process alone. She's been frozen now for almost 5 months.

I’ll admit, I’m a bit jealous of her. These past few months have been especially rough for me, and it hurts me knowing she doesn’t have to experience any of it. I’ve even debated blowing the rest of my savings on one of those freezing pods, just so I don’t have to deal with all this crap.

On the other hand, I’m also finding myself incredibly disappointed in her. By freezing herself, she’s basically ignoring all of her problems. I’ve been working to improve myself during this time and become more socially active, but what my friend is doing is totally selfish.

I don’t know what to do, I’m sad that our friendship ended this way and I wish I could have said something more to make her stay, and appreciate what we had as friends. She’s going to unfreeze herself when this pandemic is over, but who knows what the world will be like then? Please help me Jupiter.

Sincerely, “Unfrozen & Alone”

Dear, “Unfrozen & Alone,”

You need to remind yourself that you are doing the right thing by remaining unfrozen. The pandemic has caused many people to seek some form of escape, whether it’s by freezing yourself, shooting yourself into space or taking reality-altering drugs. However these escapes are only temporary solutions to bigger problems, and are only distractions from the root of those problems. Now, more than ever, we need to mobilize and focus on making the world a better place for ourselves and for others. Yes, self-care is important, but focussing too much on yourself is more destructive than it is productive. When times eventually get rougher and more overwhelming, you will only naturally envy the people in the freezing pods. However, you must remember to stay strong and remind yourself, and with that momentum remind the people you care about, that the world itself will not improve unless everyone does their part.

Don’t lose hope for her, even if you think she’s acting selfishly. She went through the same emotional process that you did, but she simply made a different decision from yours. Don’t hate her for that, people can only react to life's problems in their own way, and while this can be frustrating, it is a simple fact of life. When she eventually becomes unfrozen, try to reach out to her and educate her. It’s not too late. Remember that she has the same capacity for growth as you do.

We can’t stay frozen forever.

Best regards,

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