Advice Columnist

Collected Works

July 18, 2021 Dear Jupiter: My Tongue Has Become A Snake!
April 9, 2021 Dear Jupiter: Should I Build Robot Lips To Please My Girlfriend?
December 13, 2020 Dear Jupiter: I Can Only Express Myself Through Elaborate Performance Art
September 23, 2020 Dear Jupiter: My Best Friend Froze Herself
March 1, 2020 Dear Jupiter: My Biological Father Is Abraham Lincoln
November 1, 2019 Dear Jupiter: My Boyfriend Turned Me Into a Vampire And Dumped Me
September 26, 2019 Dear Jupiter: I Am Jealous of The Alternate-Reality Version of Myself
September 4, 2019 Dear Jupiter: "I'm a Formless Ball of Light, and I don't want my boyfriend to know."