Hair Anywhere Spray Serum Is Successful, Town Plagued by Baldness

Page Tottman,
Town Selectman

Hair Anywhere Spray, the spectacular cure for baldness, turned out to be a terrible mistake. It transformed our town into a giant forest of hair. It crippled our transportation systems. It clogged our water pipes. It blockaded people inside and outside of our homes.

Recently a cure emerged, and in short order, town employees banded together to eradicate the hair forest coating our town. They distributed a serum using sprinkler systems and fire hoses. The hair died off permanently within days.

An unforeseen side effect is that a large percentage of our townspeople have gone bald due to contact with the Hair Anywhere Spray-countering serum.

But, in the larger scheme of things, this is a worthwhile cost. Hair is just aesthetic. But our town is a real, functional system that allows people to live their lives, and it is alive and well again. So what, some people lost their hair?

For more articles by Page Tottman, click here. To get in touch with this writer, email tottman.page@surrealtimes.net.


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