Return Hair Anywhere Spray To The People

Whaler S. Fishpole,
surrealtimes.net

I’m petitioning for the Amherst town government to release the Hair Anywhere Spray formula to the people. This way, it can be studied and a permanent cure for stomach hair overflow can be developed. Innocent victims of stomach hair overflow are suffering, tied to toilets by hairs reaching out from their rectums. They deserve and desperately need justice.

Come to the Amherst common on January 13th at 2 pm to protest and sign the petition. Let’s do this.

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