AMHERST, Mass. - University of Massachusetts geoscientist Jonathan Woodruff, from his office in the Morrill Science Center, recorded tsunamograph data of cataclysmic implications. His background in sedimentology enabled him to conclude that the incoming waves, although not colossal, would compound atop the landscape ... [Continued]...
Part two.
Amherst, Ma - Official Police Report: Elderly man found in Crows Nest of Van Meter Hall at The University of Massachusetts, Amherst. The man was discovered after students on the top floor of the building heard “howling and scratching” above them on the night of November 9th at approximately 3am. Officers on sce... [Continued]...
Have you ever, while taking a stroll in North Amherst, spotted an eerie looking man who smiles while pulling a levitating duck-like alien on a leash behind him? This man is Charlie. He moved to North Amherst seventeen years ago, and he has lived there ever since. Fourteen years ago, he devoted himself to caring for thi... [Continued]...
During a visit at the campus pond last afternoon it became apparent that a turf war was boiling beneath the surface of the sitting geese. The Battle of the Beaks was unfolding: the bloodiest battle in campus pond history.... [Continued]...
In these surreal times, a newspaper is required to document the history currently unfolding. Four doctors of journalism have dedicated themselves to unearthing the truth that lies somewhere beneath the crust of what was formerly perceived. What they and their colleagues discover is conveyed in these stories.
